One Too Many Bangs For Your Buck
Movie Review
Tenzin Pelkyi
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The world will end on December 21, 2012. Okay, I don't know that for sure - but if this scenario sounds like something you would be interested in witnessing, you might consider checking out director Roland Emmerich's latest apocalyptic thriller, 2012. If not, you won't have missed out on much. At all. Remember Independence Day? How about The Day After Tomorrow? Yeah, well this is pretty much the same concept, only with flashier CG effects (and even that's debatable). In this feature film, humanity's supposed end is brought about by alien's global-warming solar-flare-eruptions. However, it is widely agreed upon in academic circles that this proposed theory has virtually no scientific merit. And the Mayan end times prophecy that fueled this whole doomsday myth is merely brushed upon and, even then, severely distorted.
But really, none of these scientific inaccuracies count for anything because there is no imperative knowledge needed for watching this movie. In fact, I would encourage you to hit the "off" switch on your brain as you enter the movie theater and just enjoy all the big fancy explosions and neat graphics.
That is what the studio had largely envisioned for this movie. I'm talking tsunamis, volcanic eruptions, earthquakes - the works. And, of course, Emmerich's trademark destruction of our historical monuments (check Eiffel Tower, Yellowstone, St Peter's Basilica - that's right, not even the Holy Father is spared from Emmerich's devastating vision).
The plotline is not much different from the usual big-budget Hollywood clichés. But hey, can you blame them?
It gives people something to cheer about: The heroic father conveniently saves mankind and is reunited with his estranged family, at which point the audience promptly breaks out into applause.
Throw in a promising young scientist, a few disgruntled politicians, a "couple of old fools" that redeem themselves right at the last second before it's too late and you've got a guaranteed blockbuster. Oh yeah, and the best part, the dog making it out alive over the 6 billion people. Man's best friend indeed.
And who can forget all the rest? Well, I can. Because the true cataclysmic event here is how these mammoth movie studios continue to get people to pay increasingly ridiculous sums of money (I mean, come on, ten bucks for a lousy movie? The humanity!) for the same regurgitated concepts.
That, my fellow movie-goers, is the real global catastrophe.
So on that note, I urge you, run! Save yourselves from this disaster - of a movie!
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